January 24, 2013
-
Really, I’m Fine. (I lie)
Whatever “fine” is. After awhile (days and days and days of life), I get really tired of being passive. People get spoiled and take advantage of me. Then I say “no” and then I am the bad guy. Sheesh! Running away for awhile is SUCH an appealing thought. But it’s just a fleeting thought. This is where I am to be, to change, to grow, to make sure i am not the one taking advantage of anyone. Showing appreciation and using encouraging words is pretty much what we all need, even though a particular someone I know is not someone who would like to admit that or participate. So, yes, I am fine, but not as fine as I’d like to be. Maybe this little bump in the road is a blessing in disguise. We shall see. I’m just so sick of feeling like i am nothing but a dried up rose to the person who should be telling me that I am the most beautiful rose. Don’t worry, I’ll get over it. I stifle it and move on, being all stoic and making sure that the people around me feel special because i truly know what it feels like to NOT feel special.
Comments (26)
You are Special!!!!
Oh, Gail — I’m so sorry you’re feeling that way — you are so special; everybody should treat you well so you always know that!
Oh sweets you are special wow I have not known you long but gee you are one grand sister in the sisterhood of Xanga….Really you are the bomb…one good egg for sure….You are a beautiful rose I could go on and on,,,and when I needed smiles you made sure I got them you were and are boocoo’s of help
Dont let life or people get you down..waste of good energy! You have a good heart and thats what matters, will keep you in my thoughts..
I pray that you will feel blessed and loved today.
This makes my heart ache for you! I have had/continue to have struggles of a similar kind.
i have been struggling with this same issue the last couple of years and finally i am seeing a light come on in the mind and heart of the one involved. things are changing and getting better. it is hard work and sometimes i’ve had to behave in a way that was foreign to me (mirror the behavior back) that is what got the attention. praying for you today–this time in our life can be the most wonderful time—and it will be!–karen
Hugs and prayers.
You are beautiful, you are smart, you are worth it!!! I got to the point where I said to myself, “It really doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks of me. I know who I am, I know what I want out of this life for myself and daggone it, I’m gonna be happy even if everyone around me decides to be miserable”!!!! And you know what??? That’s exactly how I’ve been. I have my days, but all in all, I won’t let anyone spoil my party anymore!!!! Hope that helps you!!
Sorry to hear you aren’t feeling appreciated. I appreciate you, for whatever that is worth in blogland!
*hugs* I understand that feeling ALL too well. That’s like my heart’s story, I believe.
For what it’s worth, some people even find the dried up rose beautiful. 
Take care of yourself! 
You truly are a “rich gem”. You remember that, right? Boundaries are always good to establish. Never feel bad for setting boundaries.
This makes my heart hurt for you! Gail, you ARE beautiful. But not receiving affirmation or what feels like like to us from those who are the most important… that is hard. So hard. Hugs today!
@floridayankees - Thank you, Jill. SO are YOU! Special and wonderful.
@slmret - Things are much better today although the issue is still needing to be dealt with. Some people don’t like to have to face the music; they’d rather go along the way things are and I am ready for positive change. ( 8
@SisterMae - You’re so adorable, my friend and if I could give you a hug in person, I would!
@andreas_d - I do really try to not let certain people get me down and have done so well for awhile. Then I get weak. I do know better, and God knows my heart. Thank you for your encouragement!
@cerwindoris - Doris, today, I do feel loved and definately blessed. I have to trust God ALWAYS to be ALL to me, because He really is. Thank you so much for caring!
@appalolly - Every time my heart aches, I will think of and pray for you. And, that would be often.
@lifeontheWink - I love that you said that things are changing and getting better! That’s something that gives me hope!
@ata_grandma - Oh, I’ll take all the hugs and prayers I can get! Thank you!
@MadraysGarden - I did tell myself that I couldn’t let my life be ruined by someone’s thoughtlessness and misery. But, it was just too hard to be strong and happy all the way through it. I did feel a bit of determination to keep my head above the water but then it would leave me. Then, it’d come back. It comes and goes like that, depending on what is happening. I doubt that I am what you say; it’s so much easier for me to see the greatness in others and to tell them so. Me…receiving the same…so very hard to accept, yet dying to receive it from certain people. Why do I give them so much power? Grrr!
@aSeriesofFortunateEvents - In “blogland” it’s worth a lot and I thank you! Today has been a better day and I was able to spend time with one of my favorite people, my daughter-in-love.
@akarui_mitsukai - Thank you…this brought the tears into my eyes.
@TrentTribe - I do keep forgetting that I am a rich gem, at least in God’s eyes. I love you! Boundaries are definitely vital to any relationship….so hard to set and keep in place!
@lifeisadance - Thank you so much for understanding! I really don’t want too much focus on me, myself and I but my goodness, it sure would help my spirit if something could change around here; the right kind of change, for good, like forever.